Beers. Shits.

I didn't realize while it was happening just how much shit was coming out of my ass, but I should have realized.

Last night was my friend R___'s birthday party at a nice restaurant/bar on Markham street. I had three pints of beer and (probably what tipped me into the shits) a Manhattan. At the end of the night other people were ordering martinis so I thought I'd get a Manhattan. It was tasty.

The shits didn't hit me right away in the morning, I guess because I wasn't too drunk the night before, even though I was a bit hung over with an unpleasant headache. Still, the shits waited until my headache was cleared up and I'd had a lot of water to drink. Maybe that was better.

Anyhow, the night before my girlfriend and I made chicken burritos and you can make out a yellow kernel of corn in the bottom right corner of that pile of shit. Apparently I should chew better.

Friend's girlfriend drips poo from toilet to shower!

Sorry for the tease, no picture just a quick little update to tell you about a friend of mine.

Went out with a friend of mine tonight, a clean freak who likes to use disinfectant wipes on his phone at work and on door handles at least once a week (and yet would sometimes put condoms on pay phones as a prank).

I mentioned to him about discovering my girlfriend's giant poos and he told me that his girlfriend has a disturbing habit of not wiping every time. Usually it's just when she's going to shower right after so it's not a big deal but on more than TWO occassions my friend has gone into the bathroom after her and discovered poo drippings on either the floor or the edge of the bathtub!!

Now, I may be the kind of guy who takes pictures of his poo and posts them on the internet, but I would never subject anyone to having to experience my poos outside of a toilet and in person. That's just gross!

A New Day

Yeah, I don't know what happened the last couple of days. On Tuesday I pooed in the afternoon, then again late at night (like, I got up out of bed at 11:30 to go poo), then in the morning too! The last two weren't photographed because I was at my girlfriend's house. Maybe it was the waffles?

On our way home the other night my girlfriend and I spotted a pile of junk left over from a yard sale. It appeared to be free for the taking. Among the dishrack and a bunch of other crap was a heart shaped waffle iron! So we took it and looked up recipes. Pretty delicious! Then later on I got piles of poop backed up in me. Go figure.

I told my roommate about this blog. I'd mentioned starting something like this a long time ago and then one day she heard the shutter sound effect of my phone while I was in the bathroom. What lie could I have possibly invented to cover my tracks? So I told her the truth. I have begun documenting my poos and publishing them online. She had a look. She doesn't think my poos look healthy. I can't argue, but I feel healthy. She may begin taking photos of her poos as well. She may end up another writer on this blog. Probably not though because she's a squeemish little girl. We'll see.

Curry!

Sorry, but I missed a poo. I took a poo sunday afternoon but didn't take a picture of it. I apologize. I was at my girlfriend's place and she would have wondered if she had heard the shutter sound from my phone camera in the bathroom. I was not prepared to explain this whole thing.

My girlfriend and I had some friends over to her place on saturday and we made the Vegetable Curry from Gordon Ramsay's Fast Food. It was pretty darn good and everything from the rice to the naan bread to the curry came together perfectly.

This shit was likely the result of that dinner because the one before that had been brewing for about two days. I didn't poo at all between friday afternoon and sunday afternoon, so the poo I had probably didn't contain any of the curry. This poo, this morning, however, most likely was all curry. I always get lots of little poos with tiny floaty bits when I've eaten a lot of vegetables. So there you have it.