Dingle Berries and Preserves

Last night


This afternoon

Technically these two poos occurred on different days, but to me they are just two parts of the same poo.

I didn't poo on Sunday or Monday, and I didn't poo on Tuesday until after I got home, which was about 11pm. My girlfriend and I had a nice bike ride up to Mt. Pleasant cemetery and through some parks and along St. Clair West. That was our Canada Day, nice but not too exciting. It was a lot of sunlight and we were pretty tired at the end of the day but had to stay up for Gordon Ramsay and Hell's Kitchen, which we thought would be the last episode BUT IT WASN'T!!

Anyway, we could see fireworks fairly well from my girlfriend's window so we didn't go out and besides I was planning on getting up at 4am the next morning. So I went home. I didn't end up getting to bed until midnight or so and spent some of that awake time trying to push out what turned out to be that little shit at the top of this post. Out of all the time I spent on the toilet last night a fair amount of it took place with the little nub in the foreground dangling from my anus hairs. Not an entirely unpleasant feeling, but certainly undesireable.

Well it took forever and I was very disappointed to see that that was all there was. I was sure there was more.

I slept poorly and woke up at 4:20am to get on a train, then a bus, to Bowmanville to have a meeting with someone at the Clarington town hall. I didn't really have time to poo this morning even though I definitely felt like I needed to. In fact, I knew I had to poo with great certainty for most of the train ride and all through the meeting. AND BACK HOME AGAIN!

Finally I was home, but there was a message for me from my old boss who wanted to borrow my key to one of the stores because no one seemed to have a copy(!), so I had to leave again, still without having poo'd! By the time I got back home again I was ready to go, and it was quite glorious. Not a huge crap but substantial and definitely related to last night's event.

The End.

... or is it?
(it is for today)

Exclamation!

So I got up at 5, got dressed, ate some mini-wheats and left my girlfriend's apartment with the intention of coming home, doing today's p90x workout, eating some more breakfast and having my day get off to a strong start before 9am.

I didn't feel all that tired. I felt pretty good considering the recipe I made for dinner last night called for a 1/4 glass of white wine, so I drank the rest of it. I got home and had Poo #1 up there at the top. Not much of a poo. I thought there'd be a lot more but even that little bit was hard to get out.

I sat down at my computer and had a look at what the day's workout had in store for me and decided to have a nap. After an hour though I still didn't feel up to it. I guess I was in fact hung over a little. tch tch. So I slept some more, until about 9:15 or so I guess. Feeling much better I got up and guess what! Another poo (#2)! Much more satisfying, the kind of poo I want to have when I'm hung over. Cleansing, you know?

So now I'm feeling much better, but it's too late in the morning to work out, so I'm doing more productive things and will work out in the afternoon.

P.S.: I made Gordon Ramsay's Baked Chicken in a zucchini, eggplant and tomato ragout and it was REALLY GOOD. Just about the best chicken I've ever made. I highly recommend picking up "Fast Food", great recipes and nice design too!

Oh yeah!

Here we go! This is why we're here isn't it?! One nice, long, thick cable to brag about! Yes!

Last night I cooked for my girlfriend and myself. It was the Sticky Lemon Chicken with Champ recipe from Gordon Ramsay's Fast Food book. It was really good and quite simple to make. Didn't cost much either. I think next time I'll slice up the chicken a bit thinner, or maybe even cut into it so that some of the flavour makes its way inside the meat, but yeah, it was pretty darn good.

I'm into the final week of Phase One of p90x, and I'm pretty excited to be done with some of the workouts. I realize the workouts coming up in Phase Two will be at least as tough but I'm just getting tired of some of the banter of the videos. It'll be nice to change it up some.

So I'm still looking for work. I think it's going to come down to me calling up offices and asking if I can work for them on a volunteer basis, for free. I'm not sure exactly how to do that, or if it is done, but I can't let this be another Lost Summer. Wish me luck!

Disconcerting

First poo in a little while for me. Not sure what's going on. Probably just a little stressed or tense. Maybe not enough fibre in this p90x diet, I don't know.

Nice double helix on this bunch of poo though eh? Kind of looks like some DNA or one of those twisty donuts.

I'm a little concerned about the advertising on this blog. I've got it set up with adsense, but I'm not getting anything. Sometimes there are ads, sometimes there aren't, sometimes they're charity ads. I was really hoping to see ads for exlax or fibre supplements. I thought talking about my p90x experience would help generate ads for p90x, I thought talking about being a fan of Gordon Ramsay would generate Gordon Ramsay ads, but I guess high rollers like Fox and the Food Network don't need to advertise with Google. It's a little disappointing that's all.

Also I'm not getting any readers. Not sure how to promote this thing. Can't seem to find any similar forums or other blogs where readers might be interested in this sort of thing. Shit.

Gordon Ramsay's Fast Poo

Yesterday morning I lined up to try to get a wrist band so my girlfriend and I could get Gordon Ramsay to sign a copy of his new book Fast Food. Unfortunately there were at least a hundred people who beat me to the punch by about two hours. Oh well.

Apparently people in Burlington camped out for 24 hours to get a chance to see Ramsay. I figured it was just as well because we'd just have to wait in line for another three hours or more inside a crowded store.

Instead my girlfriend and I went to the Eaton Centre, checked out the situation at Indigo, had dinner at Mr. Greenjeans, then went back to Indigo to see if we could catch a glimpse of Ramsay. We did, we got to see him through the front windows, and took a couple of pictures. It was almost exciting. We might have stuck around longer but my girlfriend had to poo (interesting) so we headed home.

This poo came about this morning after I came home from her house to do some p90x. It was quick and easy and left me feeling well prepared to take on another hour of p90x, which was exhausting. I have a feeling it is always going to be exhausting. My arms still haven't recovered from yesterday and tomorrow I'm supposed to do a Shoulders and Arms workout. Holy shit, how will I manage that? I guess we'll see!

Did some grocery shopping. Bought a bunch of red lettuce, broccoli, sliced ham, organic apples, egg whites, rye bread, etc, etc. Mostly all these things were on the p90x shopping list, so now I just have to keep an eye on portions.

Curry!

Sorry, but I missed a poo. I took a poo sunday afternoon but didn't take a picture of it. I apologize. I was at my girlfriend's place and she would have wondered if she had heard the shutter sound from my phone camera in the bathroom. I was not prepared to explain this whole thing.

My girlfriend and I had some friends over to her place on saturday and we made the Vegetable Curry from Gordon Ramsay's Fast Food. It was pretty darn good and everything from the rice to the naan bread to the curry came together perfectly.

This shit was likely the result of that dinner because the one before that had been brewing for about two days. I didn't poo at all between friday afternoon and sunday afternoon, so the poo I had probably didn't contain any of the curry. This poo, this morning, however, most likely was all curry. I always get lots of little poos with tiny floaty bits when I've eaten a lot of vegetables. So there you have it.

After-School Special (the poo)

mmmm, hmmmm. Last day of school, split a pitcher with a friend, got back to the girlfriend's house (the girlfriend who doesn't know about this blog and wouldn't understand), and had a nice poo while reading Gordon Ramsay's new book "Gordon Ramsay's Fast Food".

Not very many vegetarian dishes in the book but we're going to pick something from it to make for our gay vegetarian friend Dylan tomorrow evening. A couple of weeks ago we had a nice success with the carmelized banana split, so we thought we'd try something new. He's going to be doing a signing later in the month so we figured we ought to pick a couple of favourite recipes in case he asks.

The poo was quite comfortable. It just sort of slid out without much fuss. Not a memorable poo, but then again that's probably a good thing.