Thursday, January 8, 2009

Poos and News

In the news, a Man sent poo through the mail, now he's being indicted. But first:

This poo must have been brewing for a while. Maybe I'm sick, I don't know, but the last few days my stomach hasn't taken much time off from rumbling and gurgling and I've been very gassy.

Well today I was at school in the computer lab and it eventually became apparent that I needed to poo so I headed off to the handicap washroom (single toilet, locking door, quite nice) to make my dump. It started with a spattering of shit and fluid like most of them have been lately. You can see at the bottom of the image a phlegmy looking item, but it isn't phlegm, it came out of my ass. I had always been under the impression that Santorum only resulted from anal sex, but this seems to be about the same kind of stuff as I've heard about. Who can say?

Anyhow, it was gross (as it usually is), but as has been the case in recent days this poo was not without complexity.

What started with a spattering of shit and fluids became a drip, drop, plop of cheesy-shaped shits that really turned my stomach. They resembled those dense, crunchy cheesies, not so much the cat poo-looking ones, and they were light, i guess, so they tended to dangle prior to the plunge. All I wanted was a good, satisfying SHIT, but instead I got a series of tiny, gassy, dangling bastard poops trotting out of my asshole like dawdling school children. Finally the last one made its way through and I sat comfortably as my innards resettled themselves and I wiggled my backside to prevent any danglers from following me off the toilet as I took the photo.

Now to our top story:
A Sioux Falls man was indicted Tuesday in federal court for allegedly sending animal feces through the mail. Jeffrey Scott DeZeeuw, 45, is charged in U.S. District Court in Sioux Falls with mailing injurious articles. The indictment alleges that on July 21, DeZeeuw sent animal feces in a letter addressed to the Minnehaha County Clerk of Courts.

C-Monster says no to art involving bodily fluids.
With commentary by another blogger.

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